When it comes to clothing, everyone has the right to wear what they choose and feel comfortable in.
Obviously, there are situations where certain garments aren’t appropriate, but again that’s not necessarily for us to decide.
One thing that seems to cause issues for people is whether or not to wear a bra – some love wearing them, others find them restrictive and unnecessary.
A young woman has shared how she decided to give up wearing bras altogether as she feels she has “nonexistent boobs” and finds the undergarments “uncomfortable and expensive”.
For a year and a half, she hasn’t worn one and has got used to doing so, however she claims she recently encountered a problem over this at her local gym.
The unnamed 25-year-old has since taken to Reddit to share an incident that occurred due to her not wearing a bra and ask for some advice on whether she handled the situation correctly.
In a post on the Am I The Ahole forum, she wrote: “I f*ing hate wearing bras. They’re uncomfortable, constricting, and expensive. With work from home, I spent the last year and a half basically never wearing a bra and got used to it. Quite frankly, my boobs are nonexistent anyways.
“I recently started going to the gym again and started working out braless. I should note that up until now, no one has ever pointed out anything wrong with me not wearing a bra. However, in the middle of a set of squats (yes, MID SQUAT), a guy comes up to me, taps me on the shoulder to get my attention, and tells me that my nipples are poking through my shirt. I get really irritated because why is this guy staring at my nipples in the first place and then stopping me mid-set to inform me?
“I get really annoyed, try to finish my set, but then this f***er literally grabs the bar, as I ascend and re-racks it for me. He claimed it looked like I was having trouble with the last rep, and that he had come over to make sure I could do it, then noticed my nipples.”
Stunned, she told the stranger she did not need his help and asked why he had been looking at her chest in the first place.
“He said he was going to spot me, but then noticed my chest and thought it’d be inappropriate,” she continued.
“I pointed out that the safety bar was set, so even if I did fail the set, he wasn’t needed. But he just insisted people at gyms look out for each other, and that going forward, I should probably wear a bra so other people wouldn’t get uncomfortable and that it may help me stay more balanced in my squats.
“I’m literally the only girl at the weights section of the gym at the moment, and other guys who were squatting and failed sets never have to worry about this s**t. I’ve seen guys fail multiple sets in a row and no one ever rushes to their aid, but I have a very slight pause, and everyone thinks I need rescuing. So I’m now really annoyed and also kind of uncomfortable that this guy I’ve never spoken to in my life thinks he’s helping me and then has the audacity to tell me how to dress.
“So I tell him ‘You have bigger boobs and nipples than I do. Maybe YOU should wear a bra so people won’t get uncomfortable and you won’t fail your squats.’ He then got really defensive, saying he was just trying to help, then called me a bh. Honestly, I’m not sure if I overreacted, but I’m still kind of ped off so maybe that’s clouding my judgment. AITA?”
More than 2,000 people have since responded to her post, sharing their thoughts and supportive messages.
One person wrote: “NTA. Report it to your gym, he had no right to comment on your body at all, and no right to try and assert his ‘help’ onto you, if he can’t control himself from staring at another person’s body then he shouldn’t be at a place where he’s going to encounter all manner of bodies.”
Another said: “It is not our job to control men’s thoughts and actions. They need to do it no matter what we are wearing, what we are doing, where we are. (Vice versa for us.)”
A third replied: “I’ve interrupted someone at the gym once, and it was because she was locking her knees out on a leg press and looked like she was struggling hard on each rep. Outside of safety, I see no reason to interrupt someone’s workout. I might ask if they got it if they are struggling, but most of the time I’m in my own bubble. I’m there to workout not socialize.”